VP Eng | ILM Executive Coach | Neurodivergent | Chief Racoon Officer

Haiku: The EM Who Went Full IC

May 27, 2026 | new-manager, management, haiku, fun

“Be an IC,” they said.
EM merged forty PRs.
No team left now, whoops.

Come share your own management haiku on LinkedIn

a tired raccoon alone at a dark office desk surrounded by sticky notes reading TODO: EVERYTHING, OWNERS: UNKNOWN and ESCALATIONS: ME, a mug labelled ONE RACCOON DEV OPS DEPT, a laptop covered in PROD DOWN and NOT MY PROBLEM ANYMORE stickers, a clock showing 02:00, and a whiteboard joking that the EM merged forty PRs and now has no team left